We haven't had heat in 3 days. I'm currently at work with a coworker that might just be the most endearing yet exasperating person in THE ENTIRE WORLD.
pretty sure this is a preview of hell.
Last night, in an effort to stay warm, i agreed that sleeping on bella's great grandma's couch with a 9 year old and my mother in law sounded like a GOOD IDEA. i use the term *sleep* loosely. When not counting cockroaches and explaining why her great uncle was entertaining a prostitute in the laundry room, i prayed for swift death. I woke up smelling like a cross between a urinal and wet dog.
My mom sent $ for christmas. 3/4 of it has gone to a kerosene heater. Which is being housed at my in laws. Which means i'll get to be warm at least tonite. While i sleep on the floor. With my inhalers. Becuz they're chain-smokers.
Christmas is in 5 days. I have no money. No presents for anyone here. And a headache THIS BIG.
i know i'm being really grumpy and selfish. And God? If this is what it felt like a few hundred years ago when mary & joseph were just trying to find a warm place to lay their heads... Well this is an awfully big humbling.
so i want to thank you. Thank you for the important things that matter. Thank you for my family. Thank you for love. And thank you for reminding me of that with your own perfect love and gift of yourself.
And if you could see fit to turn the heat back on? That'd be awesome.
2 comments:
Oh Kat, Your post makes me remember (was it 3 years ago now?) that southern NE was hit by an ice storm that knocked out power here for 12 days. 5 days into it we got a generator (finances weren't so much the issue at that time for us)but it still didn't run everything. We were so blessed to have an old propane cookstove in our basement (and I mean really old) so that we could cook but Rylan was just a little over a year then and I was so worried about him getting too cold especially with his lung problems. We went to a neighbors (the boys and I to seek refuge) The morning after we lost power (my birthday) Dustin came home off of the truck and whisked us off to his Aunts house in eastern NE where they hadn't been hit so hard. I was so depressed because I didn't get to celebrate my birthday and I remember feeling so out of place (especially with a toddler in a very non-toddler friendly home), crammed in and uncomfortable. It had it's good moments though. I had been planning on doing all my holiday baking the week the storm hit and so I ended up taking all my ingredients with me and my sister-in-laws and mother-in-law and I all baked all night for Christmas. I know it's hard right now but try and look for some good in this. I'll be praying for your asthma to be relieved and your spirits to be lifted. I love you so much and you in my thoughts and prayers.
I so hope you are out of there and back in your comfy home. Honestly take away everything but my bed and my home filled with my family. Something to be said about home. :)
I can't tell you how much I appreciate your comments on my blog. How much I have been given by people I will probably never meet. I love it.
You inspire me and your honesty when you write makes me feel not so alone.
Thank you so much. Sending light and love and elctricity your way. :)
Courage
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